The Crutch may be dead, but it's editor will now be contributing to Monte's Gauntlet, described as "a critic's worst nightmare and a music fan's heaven." Let's just say that it is Fire Joe Morgan for the musical set, Metacritic with an opinion. Hello, friend.
Here is a taste:
Blogcritics.orgThe mission statement says it all:
Writer: Aaron McMullan
"Ben Kweller opens with 'Run,' which you'll remember from a couple paragraphs ago, and what 'Run' does is it makes a couple things clear with regards what a fella can expect over the duration of the album, thematically and musically. With regards the former, themes of running. That's what we're talking about. Running."
*It takes the writer too long to get to this. He mentions masturbating in his teens (contrasting his experiences with Kweller's, who was touring the world at 15), when in fact, he's still jerking off - this time, with his writing. Get to the point.
"Ben Kweller's songs, you can find out if folks've heard them by taking a stool sample. They cluster and bunch and swell in every corner of a person's being, traces of them skit about the gastrointestinal tract for months afterwards. Special kindsa songs, y'unnerstann, they'll do that."
*If you're trying to compliment someone's music, don't use shit as an analogy.
Overall:
This review is way too long, completely self-involved, and a poor attempt at being clever. It's not worth wading through this review to get information.
Review Rating: 12% [Ben Kweller - Ben Kweller (ATO)]
"As a reader, who do you turn to? As a music fan, who can you trust? You visit seven websites a day, can't rely on $5 magazines, and grow tiresome of the sarcastic tone that has flooded the arena of music criticism. People are cutting down artists that haven't even grown legs, covering only select pieces of the independent realm, and offering misleading information and ignorant perspectives. It's out of control." [Read the entire Mission Statement]
No comments:
Post a Comment